This Domain Is Full Of Crap

INGREDIENTS:
1 lemon
3 cups ranch dressing
1/4 cup roasted green chilies
1/4 cup sliced jalapenos
3 tablespoons fresh cilantro leaves
DIRECTIONS:
Squeeze lemon juice into blender
Put the rest of the ingredients in blender
Blend thoroughly

INGREDIENTS:
1/2 cup butter, softened
1/3 cup honey
DIRECTIONS:
Melt butter
Beat butter and honey together until creamy
Serve at room temperature

INGREDIENTS:
1 package of Pillsbury Crescent rolls
1 1/2 tablespoon Worchestershire sauce
1/4 cup Parmesan cheese
1 4 oz. can mushrooms, drained and chopped
4 oz. cream cheese
1 teaspoon paprika
DIRECTIONS:
Spray some cookie sheets with non-stick spray
Preheat the oven 375 degrees F
Chop up the mushrooms like a berserk samurai
Mix up the cream cheese, Parmesan cheese, Worchestershire sauce, mushrooms, and paprika in a bowl until it becomes a lumpy mush
Lay out a non-stick rolling surface or flour a countertop
Break open the crescent roll package
Separate the package out into the four rectangles
Pinch the diagonal lines up on both sides so the rectangles are solid
Spray a rolling pin with non-stick spray
Roll out the rectangles so they're nice and thin
Smear a glob or two of the lumpy mush into the crescent roll rectangle
Roll up the rectangle along the long edge
Slice up the roll in thumb-width segments
Pop those bits on to a cookie sheet
Bake from 13 (fresh) to 17 (frozen) minutes until golden brown
Or you can freeze them on the cookie sheets for future use