This Blog Is Full Of Crap

Bruwyn has gotten go big!

Obviously he doesn't like what was for dinner.

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Cubicle Drone

Support Lobster was punished for eating Kirk...

This means war.

Some thoughts on David Carradine:

• How is it that celebrities hang themselves from the shower curtain rod, but when I put two towels over mine, it falls down?

• Will David Carradine be buried with a pebble in his hand?

• Someone in Bangkok knows the Five Pointed Palm Heart Exploding technique, apparently.

It's this kind of constantly updating crap you'll get when you subscribe to my Twitter feed.

One of these days I'll split apart isfullofcrap and LaurenceSimon and CrapMariner.

Until then, suffer and drink from the firehose.

It's time for a kittymovie with the boys.

Today's feature is on a fence:

Nardo is not fast enough for Bruwyn.

Flickr and Youtube need to make it easier to add photos and movies to relevant groups.

Dragging and dropping is so much effort for a lazy-ass like me.

Time to submit this to The Ark and Carnival of the Cats.

I looked at the headlines crediting Carlos Lee for the victory yesterday, citing his grand slam.

Then I looked at the game log closer.

The grand slam came well after the Astros were in a victory position.

Carlos' early appearances at the plate had ended innings, either stranging runners or getting nailed for bad baserunning himself.

A grand slam is an impressive thing, but when it's padding statistics that show a player's not earning his keep in clutch situations, it's a horrible thing for the cheerleaders in the press to point to and wait for Uncle Drayton to pat them on the heads. (And, sometimes, give them ice cream)

Forget WiFi...

Just make sure the room has JdCc.

Last time around, there was much "democracy babe" ballyhooing over the Lebanese elections.

Uh huh. A few carbombs later, and Hezbollah was pretty much in control of the government.

It's just a matter of time before it happens again, whether through the majority coalition's kowtowing to the terrorist group with "unity" overtures, or the expected carbombing, assassination, threats, and hostage-taking as before.

Lebanon continues to violate UN Security Council Resolution 1701 daily by refusing to disarm Hezbollah and allowing Iran/Syria to supply it with missiles. UNIFIL continues to be a great place to dump soldiers you don't mind seeing threatened, browbeaten, and pretty much subjugated by the locals.

The shell game with Syria and the UN over the border claims of Cheba Farms are a load of crap. Anything for the Lebanese to justify letting Hezbollah continue its dirty work.

What a fucking joke. The job should have been finished in 2006.

So, Supreme Court Nominee Sotomayor broke her ankle at LaGuardia airport rushing around for confirmation meetings.

Since this is what we would expect from a "wise Latina woman" we're left guessing what injuries would be suffered by other demographics...

Old White Guy: broken hip
Old White Woman: fractured collarbone
Young White Guy: cracked iPhone case
Young White Woman: broken heel on shoe, broken nail

Old Black Man: broken insulin bottle
Old Black Woman: broken arm
Young Black Man: arrested for drug posession
Young Black Woman: her boyfriend's jaw gets broken

So, how about Hispanics? Jews? Chinese?

The comments are open. Let's remind the country why we need a wise Latina woman with her lfie experiences on the court!

Anybody else get the feeling all this mail will be on the floor at the end of the day?

That's Bruwyn's idea of "sorting." He kicks it in all sorts of places.

When I see stories of childish attempts to obstruct procedure like this, I can't help but think that all the elected officials involved in this circus of bullshit shouldn't just be locked in chamber, toss in a few Molotovs, and hold interim elections to replace these fucktards:

During the coup, Democrats fled the chamber, turned out the lights, and cut off the Internet feed of chamber proceedings, leaving Republicans and their two Democratic friends to take the vote in the dark.

A media advisory released by Mark Hansen, a spokesman for the Senate's GOP conference, foreshadowed the shake-up: "An historic change in leadership is taking place at this moment and a new bipartisan, coalition is being established that is bringing real reform to the Senate RIGHT NOW."

Smith was elected Temporary President and Majority Leader of the New York State Senate in January of 2009, becoming the first African-American Majority Leader in New York State history and the first Democratic leader in almost 40 years.

Gov. David Paterson, who is noticeably furious, addressed the coup at an evening news conference.

"I should be standing here talking to you about the issues that the people need Albany to address. Once again Albany's dysfunction has raised its ugly head," Paterson said. "I came here today to stand up for everyone in this state who still believes in a democracy -- that there are perimeters in which we govern, that Albany can be more than the dysfunctional wreck it has become over the years. And I don't care if the only one standing, but someone has got to stand up and say that this is wrong.

"The last two weeks of session is not the time when we conduct campaigns. It is not the time when we elect leaders. It is not the time for politics. It is the time for governance."

Shut up, sit down, and do your jobs.

If you can't, then leave a note on your desk saying you resign along with your keys and any work-related IDs.

In fact, just empty your pockets, put them on the desk, and head for the nearest bridge to jump off of.

The country doesn't pathetic wastes of taxpayer dollars like you who don't even have the courage to properly bicker and nitpick.

This man was Obama's pastor for twenty years:

"Regret for what... that the media went back five, seven, 10 years and spent $4,000 buying 20 years worth of sermons to hear what I've been preaching for 20 years?

"Regret for preaching like I've been preaching for 50 years? Absolutely none," Wright said.

Oh good. That's clears that up. He hasn't just been an asshole for as long as he preached to Obama. He's been an asshole all throughout his professional hatemongering for life.

Glad that's cleared up.

Asked if he had spoken to the President, Wright said: "Them Jews aren't going to let him talk to me. I told my baby daughter, that he'll talk to me in five years when he's a lame duck, or in eight years when he's out of office. ...

"They will not let him to talk to somebody who calls a spade what it is. ... I said from the beginning: He's a politician; I'm a pastor. He's got to do what politicians do."

I'd better check my Blackberry to see when's my next shift for keeping Obama from talking to Wright.

Just got off of a double controlling the banking system, and I'm hoping for a promotion to Weather Control next month.

I'm seeing reports of shooting at the Holocaust Museum in DC.

*sigh*

Other reports say one of those shot is the gunman.

Here's hoping he's the only fatality.

And it is worth every dime.

I got out of work and headed to the 53 stop.

Then I realized that there was something I needed to do.

I ran to the Danger Train and got on.

The train took me to Museum District.

I ran off and headed to the Houston Holocaust Museum.

When I arrived, I walked to the front desk and put down my credit card.

The volunteer was preparing to head out for the day.

They close at five, and it was pretty close to five.

"Not before you put a $100 on this," I said.

They offered me some water while I waited, and then brought me this bottle.

Worth every dime.

I didn't stay long. But I did move a stone.

As Aussie Dave said:

May G-d bless Stephen Tyrone Johns, comfort his family and avenge his blood.

Couldn't say it any better myself.

Apparently, Drayton can't figure out how to charge people for nice weather so...

He's closing the roof.

Thursday daygame equals half day at work.

Simple math, simple pleasures.

There was an announcement that kids can get free tickets to games if accompanied by their parent, etc and so forth.

Drayton's not dumb... he's just an asshole. The seats weren't going to be used anyway, so he figures he can get them in the door to buy a few of those $7.25 beers.

Speaking of a few beers, Aramark's in hot $4.00-a-bottle water with the TABC over one of their drones getting wasted and killing a pedestrian.

It's not known whether they will lose their beer or liquor license.

Here's my question: Is this a failure of a reporter not bothering to ask for the details, or is this a failure of our government in not offering up all the information available in the public record?

Jeff Blum hit another game-winning walkoff.

Aubrey who?
Morgan who?
Ty who?

Anybody who claims they didn't hear anything about the digital conversion of television that gets fucked by the changeover today deserves to get fucked over.

And if you think it's the fault of your low-power, sub-200 market broadcaster in your Butt Fuck Egypt armpit of the country not splashing enough crawls or airing enough PSAs, fine - walk across the trailer park with a Molotov and burn down the double-wide that houses their studio.

The Texans are trying to sign Rex Grossman.

No. Really.

I shit you not.

With Brokeback Schaub, Rex "The Mess" Grossman, and Dan "0-16" Orlovsky on the roster, there hasn't been a more miserable group taking snaps since Stevie Wonder picked up the Kannon AE-1.

Why did we build a stadium for these incompetent fuckfaces?

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is being declared the winner in the Iranian elections.

Barring a civil war as a result of Mirhossein Mousavi claiming victory and refusing to back down, the voters living near nuclear facilities in Iran have signed their own death warrants.

I'd say "May God have mercy on their souls" but looking at how they've acted in the past 30 years, it's hard to imagine many souls worthy of mercy among them.

Bruwyn volunteers to be a tub toy...

I tried to grab him and sing Rubber Ducky but he scampered off.

I don't get much feedback on the podcast, but when I do, it's always amusing to see how much people think I rock or suck.

I should reach out more and shamelessly whore my stuff on forums. But I am a lazy fellow, so not only do I fail to whore my crap, I don't even implore or command minions to do it for me.

The few that do it on their own, well, this person thinks my suck-level is 75%, maybe a bit more. (I think you'll enjoy my response)

From that, I have learned about Name Your Tale. Neat site. Maybe others will enjoy it. Or not.

I really enjoy Norm Sherman's Drabblecast. He did an Escape Pod guest-hosting recently that was pretty badass.

I decided to check on Drabble on WikiPedia, only to find that my site and a few others had been removed form the article, but Norm's was there. Good to see Norm there, but some asshole named McGeddon had removed mine as well as the 100words.com referenced in the article.

What the fuck is wrong with people? Did the dog stop playing Fetch with you, so you put the stick up your ass?

Oh well. I'll fix it, and I'm putting a reminder in my Blackberry to check it every week to see if that asshole pops back in.

In the meantime, I'd better get to writing today's story.

Maybe if I try hard enough, I can have 80% of my stories suck... 85%.... 90%.... perhaps even breaking the 100% suck barrier and have 105% of my stories suck?

That's so totally worth a pizza trophy.

Yahoo Sports predicts that Uncle Drayton will have a fire sale soon.

Sorry, folks, but at no time do they mention beer prices. (Or, for that matter, discounts on anti-hallucinatory drugs for Richard Justice.)

I believe that METRO's numbers are lies.

Forget the science.
Forget the statistics.
Forget METRO becoming a sponge for cast-off Chron Commies and other media lackeys.

What I consider to be the proof is the fact that METRO fights tooth and nail to dodge, twist, avoid, and ignore Tom Bazan's FOIA requests. When a judge or DA backs him up, METRO violates its charter as a quasi-pubic agency and still does their best to refuse to meet his request - that's a sign that something dirty is going on.

They are trying to hide something, they are waving the tattered flag of 9/11 and public safety to refuse to answer the most simple requests that don't involve public safety in the slightest, and that's enough to convince me that they are lying.

Now, you can counter this with the wolverine-like fervor that the Bush Administration fought to conceal information and memos about its various activities, but that's DC... what I'm talking about here are ridership statistics, current leakage research, revenue analysis and other things that, if released to the public, won't result in treason charges or people dying or bad people being released on technicalities.

It's as asinine as comparing the morons in LA who rioted after the Lakers won to the rioters in Iran who are pissed off that the election was rigged.

Let's forget the crooks in DC for a moment and just focus on the ones in our own Downtown, okay?

I'm reading a faux news story about Captain America being brought back.

That got me to thinking of Captain Palestine.

What? Never heard of him?

Man, did he hit the newstand like a bo-

Oh. Wait.

He did hit the newstand like a bomb.

You know, the guy who uses a human shield and is also dead, but he's surrounded by 72 raisins.

What else does Marvel need to know about this guy before they can draw up his own comic book series?

Sandmonkey reports that Hezollah is operating in Iran.

I figure for them, it's a training mission for when they head back to Lebanon to suppress any post-election issues there.

In a nutshell, my Iran opinion is: "Let one gang of Jew-haters kill the other and have Satan sort the fuckers out."

Rigged ballots in theocratic terror-sponsoring dictatorships (Iran) or hostage-states (Lebanon) or terrorist strongholds (Gaza/West Bank) or socialist terrorist-supporters (Venezuela) are bullshit.

Jimmy Carter's beloved Hamas and Hezbollah have been brought in as mercenaries to spread fear, terror, and the occasional bloodshed among the protest organizers who probably participated in rallies shouting OUR BLOOD AND BODIES FOR PALESTINE! It is a rare time I wish them success in their deadly missions (see first statement), but at heavy losses to their own gangs of killers (see first statement again), of course.

Laughing at media who think this is a social media revolution against Iran dictatorship. It's a revolution against OLD GATEKEEPER MEDIA. CNN and its rivals are competing for bragging rights over who truly, deeply sucked the least with the least amount of resources used to provide the greatest amount of airtime (but not comprehensive and well-reasoned analysis.)

Potesters want their fake ballots for their own puppet dictator counted so his fake hope and change can vanish into old hate and tyranny.

This is all a load of crap.

Donald Trump must have forgotten to ask Miss California 2.0 what she thought about gay marriage while he was "interviewing" the fuck out of her because she's also coming out publicly against gay marriage.

Same shit, different bitch.

I can understand why people are pointing cameras at her. She's pretty damn hot.

But why are you fuckers in the media turning your microphones on?

PETA is pissed off that Obama swatted a fly.

Does anybody have any invoices from PETA offices for pest control?

Roaches, ants, mice... anything that shows that a PETA office has paid to have animals more pesky and annoying than flies killed?

Somehow, I got on the X10 webcam Spam list a while back.

Every night, they send out a new Spam that screams they're finishing up one sale, starting a new one, peddling another flawed product, running low on inventory for another, and so on.

If you lived next door to these folks and their brick-and-mortar store, and you looked back at the crap they've been shrieking every day, I'd think you'd be with me in splashing kerosene on their store and tossing in a lit rag.

But it's the Internet, so shrieking like insane motherfuckers over and over and over for years is totally normal.

I'm just wondering who has their cheap crap, how badly it runs, and if all these people died in a horrible kerosene fire what the next night's Spam would look like.

X10 WE ALL DIED IN A FIRE - FIRE SALE ONE WEEK ONLY!

*sheesh*

Nardo helps make the bed...

He does this every time.

Obama preaches one thing...

President Barack Obama told a Pakistani television outlet that isolating extremists is crucial for improving ties between Muslim nations and the United States.

And yet, Obama's administration keeps reaching out to Hamas.

Schmuck.

Ed McMahon has sidekicked the bucket.

Check the Carter Center news archives for any mention of the Iranian election and protests.

Nothing. Just more ass-kissing of Hamas while refusing to follow the Geneva Conventions and deliver a letter to Gilad Shalit from his parents, or demanding that the Red Cross have access to the man.

Iran took Jimmy's balls back in 1979 and never gave them back.

It's hot out.

Duh.

Standing downtown waiting for the bus is amusing... I'm walking the tunnels to get there to enjoy as much AC as possible.

It's the walk from the bus home that gets interesting...

Lots of concrete, with a brief respite in the Forest Of Fourteen Trees.

Oh well. All the more reason to bring a jug of water home.

I could say something about "Charlie's Angel is now God's Angel" but I'd rather not hurl.

This drama has been leaked, pimped, shilled, and sold to the media for the past few months, and I've given up on figuring out who the vultures and jackals are. I've given up trying to figure out the message and meaning of all this.

I still think it's insanity when a celebrity asks for privacy when they spend part of their life using their celebrity to promote various causes. And an individual who makes money off of the publication of the condition of their body in health (aka really hot posters) rings of hypocrisy when they seek privacy because their body isn't quite healthy now.

In Farrah's case, there was a bizarre "coping with terminal illness" aspect to all this out i nthe public. Or not. Or...

As I said, I gave up trying to follow the play-by-play.

There's people dying in Tehran, wanting democracy without freedom, respect for their movement without true respect for the individual, and one dictator in place of another.

Um... there's a point I'm trying to make here... somewhere... or maybe not...

Pfffft. Who gives a shit? Beauty fades, but a well-preserved poster mounted and framed lasts forever.

Time to head to the baseball game.

Twitterers are asked to show their respects for Michael Jackson by tinting their icons white. #michaeljackson

Wave an eight-year old under his nose. See if that revives him. #michaeljackson

Have they confirmed that it isn't actually Dianna Ross?

Doesn't California have recycling laws? I know they have bins for plastic, but how much organic material can there be left of MJ?

Now comes the hard part: figuring out which Jackson is the SECOND freakiest of the bunch.

Have they managed to unchain Emmanuel Lewis from the corpse, or will he finish chewing through his leg and hop to freedom?

With Michael Jackson dead, Disneyland reduced its terror alert status from orange to yellow.

All those years of buying new noses, the freak never thought TO BUY A NEW HEART!

Somewhere in space, Elvis takes his finger off of a button and slurs "Finally got the son of a bitch."

The rumors of an eternal flame being erected at his gravesite are partially true - that's just his hair.

Although you gotta hand it to the guy - of all the ways he could bail on the London shows, this was the most spectacular.

The King Of (Coronary Artery Going) Pop

Die, child molester, die. (Said the same thing about Arafat)

I partially remembered an encounter with Michael Jackson at Epcot many years ago, a few years before Captain EO was there.

He was at the leaping fountains outside of that Kodak pavilion.

Smiling. Sad. Terrified. Alone.

Sitting quietly, looking around. He was peoplewatching.

I actually didn't notice him there. My mom pointed him out, hand on shoulder... don't react, don't say anything... just watch.

People kept their distance, didn't mob him there. No autographs, no shaking hand or head.

He almost was one of the rest of the people. He almost had it, but this aura of... not quite ordinary.

Bodyguards hovering 20-30 feet away. Epcot isn't exactly "Tall Muscular Black Man In Suit Friendly But Keenly Observant" territory, you know.

Smiles. But terrified.

I remembered the rest of it this morning.

He got mobbed as he walked past Communicore to Lagoon of Nations, left side.

People pointing, yelling... as if they were hunting dogs.

He was surrounded, paper waved at him. Pens.

The bodyguards were on either side of him.

At one point, he screamed. And he vanished.

I remember that we walked by... it was an accident we saw that, we weren't part of that mob.

Were we?

I am going over this in my mind, over and over.

I may just call my mom later today to see what she remembers.

I'm pretty sure this is close to what happened.

But if I'm remembering it wrong, I want to know what happened.

Because what happened there convinced me very early on that a human being is not built to handle such overwhelming fame and it's desire to belong, and that humans are pack hunters that feed on them.

There is one other encounter with a celebrity that shaped my view of fame, and I think y'all already know who it is: Dom Deluise.

A person who is genuinely sweet, friendly, loving, and interested in other people will emanate such a feeling... it's like walking into a walk-in fridge and the temperature drop hitting you... that sense of goodness can be felt as you approach it.

Your instincts are to want to understand that sensation, but you have to respect such a person and go easy and not become a predator... a parasite...

Like each individual found themselves becoming as they were absorbed into the mob-monster that hunted Michael Jackson.

I've always wondered if the same applies to genuinely evil people.

The world's first Jack Daniels store is at the airport 40 miles out of town?

Haven't these people heard of a place called The Galleria?

Leave it to some jackass retail consultant to come up with a location that's so inconvenient and expensive that it makes ordering something with overnight shipping from the website more attractive and economical.

In case you're too fucking lazy to watch my Twitter stream:

Was the moment of silence in the House for Michael Jackson or just to concentrate on counting bribe money for their weekly deposit slips?

Elizabeth Taylor collapsed when hearing that Michael Jackson had died? Sure she wasn't just tripping over her wedding dress?

Well, Men In Black 2 got something right: Michael Jackson is about to wear the last suit he will ever need.

#followfriday @michaeljackson - The error message says it was suspended for "strange activity." NO??? REALLY???

It's sad to think that Michael Jackson's estate might actually be a better risk for government loans/bailout than GM or Chrysler.

Neverland Ranch Salad Dressing - It's all over Baby Carrots, Baby Spinach, Sprouts...

Chuck Norris killed Michael Jackson after one too many "Moonwalker, Texas Rumpranger" comments by fans?

In lieu of flowers, the Jackson Family has asked for witnesses to continue to keep their mouths shut.

MTV is actually showing music videos again? Hrm. I can see forty-somethings bumping off music stars like a request line.

News coverage of Neil Armstrong's death, who walked on the moon, will pale in comparison to MJ's, who named a dance move after it.

@mikemcguff - Face lift? Pretty soon, chron.com will start wearing one white glove and molesting children.

Are people starting to figure out that you can't throw pills as a problem and make it go away?

Brandon Backe never amounted to his full potential as a pitcher, and giving him chance after chance as some kind of hometown hero was a huge mistake.

However, keeping him on all these years was relatively cheap compared to some of the even bigger mistakes that have been made with broken-down players who end up doing the team a favor by riding the pine: Kaz Matsui.

This team is not going to spark a second-half almost-missed comeback. The Maysonets and the Katas and Michaels are not going to get enough time o nthe field to build up any momentum to step in when the veterans fall to pieces.

This one's going to nosedive.

It's not oppressively hot yet, so I have a fan, the laptop, an iced tea, and the cats out on the patio...

Nardo's a sleepyboy...

Bruwyn's grown up so fast. (He's as tall as Nardo now, but still lanky-thin.)

The editor who was in charge of checking this article at The Daily Mail needs to be taken out back and thrown into a dumpster:

India is planning to provide its 1.1 billion-plus citizens with ID cards.

Entrepreneur, Nandan Nilekani has been chosen to lead the ambitious project which will be the second largest citizens' database in a democracy, with China being the biggest.

The government believes the scheme, which will be finalised over three years, will aid the delivery of vital social services to the poorest people who often lack sufficient identification papers.

Either the editor missed the fact that China is a communist state, or they intentionally ignored the error.

Whatever happened, the editor needs to go.

Bruwyn's been killing lizards again...

Of course, The Mighty Stripey Hunter has to inspect his student's work:

I think he approves.

I have no grief for the demise of Billy Mays.

It's one thing to manufacture schlocky products.

It's another thing to peddle them.

His family is asking for privacy and respect.

They have earned neither.

If his death is the result of injuries sustained during his recent airline trauma, then America has a new pilot hero: move over Sully, and pin a medal on the man that laid Billy Mays low.

I hope his funeral is open coffin and public so everybody can use it as a latrine.

Find no peace in your death, Mr. Mays, and may you be bombarded with schlocky ads for all eternity as the brimstone sears your soul.

I don't see her ghost anymore.

(But I still see others.)

Valverde may have been the biggest goat of Sunday's game, but handing him a one-run lead when you have a chance to hand him two or three is sheer idiocy.

Geoff Blum(notes), activated from the disabled list before the game, was hit by a pitch leading off the bottom of the seventh. Two outs later, Matsui doubled and Blum scored to give the Astros a 3-2 lead.

Ortiz retired Adam Everett(notes) leading off the eighth before he was replaced by Byrdak. The left-hander struck out the two batters he faced, not allowing a run for the 15th time in his last 18 appearances.

Matsui got to third on some heads-up baserunning (I'm just as shocked as you are).

Two men out, man on third... and...

Coop let Ortiz bat.

Yeah, I know, he's batting better than the rest of the pitching staff, but in this situation you bring out someone to at least give the Tigers a scare. Bring out Kata. Or Maysonnet (oops!) Maybe force a walk.

Fine. Bourn comes up with men on first and third. Bourn's not exactly a slugger, but if you get Matsui and Kata running with Bourn bunting, he can beat that out and the Suicide scores one.

I know, I know... they already had the lead, but if you've watched Valverde at all, you know he's easily lit up in these situations.

Which he was. I saw this coming, it came, and Coop didn't do anything to prevent it.

What? Coop needed to keep Ortiz in?

To face Adam "Swish" Everett?

Give me a break. Ortiz finished him like Valverde finishes two plates of chicken wings, and then Byrdak came in.

Byrdak could have easily mown down Adam Errorvett with his other two victims.

Coop is showing that he's been given his chance, has blown it, and it's time to sweep out the staff and bring in a new group of chuckleheads.

I, for one, hope that Jose Cruz gets a shot just so that Drayton will can his ass and finally get him out of the mix. (At least Manso is out of the mix.)

At least Mike Illitch's Motor City Pussies got their noses bloodied, their streak ended, and Adam's batting average is sinking to its usual depths.

When he was being hailed by all the fantasy wires, I was laughing... just wait, I said. Just wait.

Toyota has developed a sensor technology that allows wheelchairs to be controlled by thoughts.

Of course, being a customer of our fine public transportation system, I've seen the mental state of some of these folks who use the bus and... well, when they peel away the tinfoil and stop yammering about how Bush saw flying around New Orleans hunting people on rooftops, I don't think you want any form of machinery to be controlled by those folks.

No. Really. Take a stroll Downtown, head for Tranquility Park and City Hall, and just enjoy the ambiance of madness.

Just sayin'.

Until last night, it hadn't rained in Houston for a few weeks.

When I saw thunderstorms in the forecast, my first thought was not to cover the grill or bring in my electric fan.

it was Bruwyn is going to run around like a crazy kitty.

Sure enough, as the thunder started, he got spooked.

Nothing quite like a web cat running full-speed and leaping and growing and whining.

There's no point in trying to calm him down. He squirms away and flies off into another tizzy.

Cynthia McKinney won't get far with her Ninja Throwing Cellphone vs. the Israeli Navy:

An IDF Navy unit took over a ship that was en route to breaking the naval closure on the Gaza Strip, the IDF said in a statement Tuesday afternoon. International activists cover...

Overnight, Navy troops spotted a vessel with a Greek flag, which had embarked on a journey from the port of Larnaca in Cyprus towards the Gaza Strip.

After the Navy contacted the ship and realized it was headed to Gaza, the troops clarified that the Strip is under naval closure and that because of security concerns it will not be allowed to reach the beach of Gaza.

If there's any explosives on the boat, they should put the crew back on there and set them off.