This Blog Is Full Of Crap

Refugees willingly submit to simple biometric identification to ease processing and identification. Act like a schmuck, we'll know who you are. Have fun in the Dome.

A portion of the New Orleans Police Department is deputized and used to assist in law-enforcement issues regarding New Orleans refugees. Refugees who show appropriate aptitude and attitude are deputized as well and offered permanent positions in HPD or HFD.

A portion of New Orleans civil government is "deputized" to handle processing and management of information and social services for refugees in parallel with City of Houston, Harris County, and State of Texas.

The Astrodome is treated as a triage center from where government and private placement concerns work together to direct people to shelters within the city or in other cities around the country. When all those who can be placed are placed, naturally the remainders will be the "unplaceables." Those are "warehoused" in either prison conditions or redirected in manners to afford them opportunities to cause the city the least amount of harm.

METRO's capacity is increased to allow for easy transportation of individuals to various worksites and training centers. Free bus and rail pass, but can be revoked should you break the law.

Parallel jobs program to educate refugees for refinery work and refinery construction. Then pick a few locations for new refineries to increase capacity, whether here in Houston or elsewhere in the United States.

Blood donation, medical testing, and other exploitative work "opportunities" are forbidden to prevent abuse.

As painful and ugly zero tolerance policies are, HISD enacts no-bullshit zero tolerance policy for disciplinary purposes to enforce order and calm at overcapacity schools. New Orleans refugees showing appropriate aptitude and attitude are used as classroom assistants to teach or assist in "crowd control" issues to free up local attention and resources on classwork. Same rules apply to all.

Local employers are given a combination of carrot-and-stick to provide jobs to refugees. Tax breaks for those who hire them on a temporary basis until New Orleans is functional again. A final blanket warning regarding illegal alien workers in place of refugee migrants. If you're caught using an illegal instead of a local or a refugee, penalties are triple. Contractors who use illegals on government contract work on any level are banned for life from bidding on government contracts.

FEMA-contracted buses that were used to bring refugees here are also used to send illegal immigrants back to Mexico. Bill for fuel used is sent to Presidente Fox.

Agencies that provide welfare services to illegal aliens are given a final warning that harboring fugitives is, in fact, a felony. Furthermore, providing aid to an individual solely based on race and ethnic background is considered a discriminatory practice. Either retool your facilities and policies to aid in refugee assistance or face possible criminal charges. Training facilities are retooled towards construction labor for housing, schools, and refinery work.

When New Orleans becomes manageable, the situation would be:

• Refugees gain valuable work skills and are ready to go back and rebuild.

• They police their own.

• The truly bad seeds that run wild will be weeded out naturally by terminal interaction with well-armed locals.

• Decreased reliance on illegal labor.

• Discipline problems at HISD go down, teachers can focus on classwork.

• Construction on refinery capacity will not be hindered for lack of available labor and resources.

But I'd be interested to see what local Rice, UH, and St. Thomas policy wonks have to say. Where's Professor Stein, the go-to guy for the media when you need him most?