Customer writes to whine that they've set up a bunch of e-mail accounts in their office, but they aren't getting e-mail. They've bought a domain, so when is the mail going to start?
"What account is your webhosting under?" I ask.
"Webhosting?" They say.
"Well, you need a mail server for the mail to go so you can pick it up from there, right?" I ask.
"The salesperson said I wouldn't need one," they say.
Oh really?
I wonder what their office is like. Especially the bathroom. It must be nice to work somewhere magical that you can just put a toilet on the tile and then flush all the crap away while the bowl refills with water without having to hook it up to the sewer and water lines.
Or maybe... just maybe... they have someone hook it up for them correctly? And plan it out when they lay the office out? Or arrange to have that as part of their office leasing or building project?
Apparently, people have enough sense to know that toilets don't work as instant-on, throw-it-down-and-get-crapping devices. There's a bit of installation and preparation before you can send yesterday's lunch back to the ecosystem. So why are they completely clueless as to how such a basic thing as e-mail functions? Espeically whatever salesperson that sold them the domain without an email server to route email outbound and inbound through.
I think that the Richard Scarry people need to draw up a rock-bottom, retard-friendly basic set of picture books demonstrating basics like mail, webserving, DNS, and such. Or perhaps David Macauley can reduce it all down to the comings and goings and antics of various configurations of wooly mammoths.
Way too many ignorant people too ashamed of their ignorance to hire someone to do it for them, or maybe they're just so cheap and lazy that they don't want to hire anyone or learn how it works.
Whatever. Feel free to sit on your magical disconnected toilet and see how far it gets you.
Oh, and watch out for the smell.
Comments (1)
Then there's the computer world that my mother lives in. She has a "power box" that has the "TV" and the "Typewriter" connected to it. These are all plugged into the "Extension Cord Box" which is plugged into the wall and the telephone.
My sister signed her up for a free juno e-mail account and now Mom complains because she can't talk on the phone while typing her letters, and she can't access that "Web Thingy".
This woman has taken 4 different classes in Intro to Computers, Computers for Seniors, etc.
She still doesn't know what a file is, or if her computer has an operating system on it.
I get phone calls that go like this:
Mom: My computers doing funny things again.
Me: Are they funny enough to make money with?
Mom: I'm serious, its broken.
Me: Whats wrong?
Mom: When I try to copy my new mail from the plastic disk it doesn't work.
Me: Why are you trying to copy mail from a floppy disk?
Mom: I'm not, I'm trying to read my e-mail.
Me: Then what were you doing with the plastic disk?
Mom: I thought I needed that to read my mail.
Me: No. You need to double click the juno icon on your desktop.
Mom: Your Dad cleaned off the desk, there's nothing on it.
Me: Not the desk, the desktop. The screen on your TV after your computer starts up.
Mom: Oh, I think I deleted that. Was it important?
Me: OK, Mom, is your computer on now?
Mom: No.
Me: Turn it on now.
Mom: Can I do that while we are on the phone?
Me: Yes.
Mom: Oh that right, you're on a cell phone so it doesn't tie up your regular phone.
Me: Here Mom, talk to your grandkids while your computer starts up.
Me: I'm back, is your computer started?
Mom: Yes but the screen has that silly swirlying picture on it.
Me: That's your screen saver, just move your mouse.
Mom: Move it where?
Me: Just wiggle it back and forth.
Mom: OK I got the picture of the kids back on the TV now.
Me: Look at the bottom of the screen, is there a little picture of my kids with the words "Juno - Do Not Delete" under it?
Mom: Yes.
Me: OK, I'm going to hang up now and after you hang up the phone just double click that picture and your e-mail will open up.
Mom: Wait, I also have trouble that Juno thing keeps telling me that I'm disconnected when I try to send answers to peoples e-mails.
Me: How long did you take to type your answers?
Mom: Not long only a couple hours.
Me: Mom Juno automatically disconnects you after 30 minutes if you don't do anything with the online connection.
Mom: I was typing.
Me: Typing doesn't count. Try and keep your typing to under 30 minutes per messge.
Mom: Well that's stupid.
Me: That's computers for you. Love you Mom, hang up now and try to get your e-mail.
Two hours later I get an e-mail that tells me that she thinks her email is still broken. Only she takes 3000 words to say that.
So Can I give my Mother your number to call for help next time?
Posted by david | February 22, 2005 4:50 PM
Posted on February 22, 2005 16:50